Fault
by phoebe9509
Summary: When Hotch is upset Emily has to know if it's her fault


Hotch had asked Emily if she could watch Jack for him while he went to an important meeting. Having a soft spot in her heart for the young Hotchner she immediately agreed. When Hotch left, the two played games and even baked cookies. She read him a story about slaying dragons and he drifted off to sleep. An hour later as Emily relaxed on Hotch's couch reading a book; Hotch came stomping in his apartment slamming the door shut.

Emily looked up with a puzzled look on her face. "Hotch are you okay?"

He didn't answer her; he just headed straight for his bedroom. He needed time to think. He saw Emily get up, but he walked right past her.

"Hotch." Emily followed him towards his bedroom and was shocked when he shut the door in her face. "What is going on," she thought out loud to herself. She knocked then opened the door, and shut it with her on the inside.

"Hotch, what's wrong?" Silence. Hotch was pacing around his room, looking everywhere but at her. "Hello! It'd be awesome if you didn't ignore me you know."

"Where's Jack?"

"In his room—asleep. What happened?"

"Nothing. I don't want to talk about it."

Emily continued to stare at her disgruntled boss and started to really worry. She'd never seen him like this before. He looked defeated and broken. Then suddenly Hotch punched the wall, and Emily ran to his side and grabbed his hand.

"Oh my God! What are you doing?"

Hotch tried to pull away from her, but she held onto him. "Let go of me!"

"Tell me what happened!" Emily's voice dripped with concern.

"Prentiss get off!" He growled.

She released his hand but grabbed his face in between her hands. "Hey, look at me! Hotch look at me." His eyes finally locked onto hers. "What the hell is going on? Hotch! Talk to me, please."

Hotch dropped his head down in defeat then slowly pulled away from Emily and sat on his bed. After two minutes of silence Emily started getting impatient and took a step forward.

"I'm not leaving until you talk to me, so I'd start spilling my guts if I were you. Where did you go tonight?"

"I had a meeting."

"With who?"

"Strauss," Hotch said with enough venom to make Emily flinch.

"I should have known. What did she say?" Emily had to roll her eyes when he didn't say anything in response. "She said something to piss you off Hotch. Tell me!"

"It was nothing."

"Don't lie to me! You don't usually punch walls for no reason Hotch. So again I ask you, what did she say?"

Hotch let out a deep sigh. "She said she's giving Morgan the Unit Chief position for good."

Emily's mouth dropped open. "What? Why?"

"She wouldn't say exactly. She just mumbled that my head wasn't in it 100% anymore and my judgment gets blurred when it comes to certain team members."

Emily started to pace around the room. "What is she talking about? Your heads always on the case! Sometimes a little too much. And your judgments never blurred. God, I can't stand that bitch! She hates our team and it's starting to piss me off! But the good news about this is that Morgan wouldn't take it."

Hotch looked up at her with confusion in his eyes. "What do you mean he won't take it? He's going to take it."

"No, he's not. Morgan wouldn't do that. He knows how much it means to you, and he didn't want it when it was temporary. There's no way he's going to take it," Emily said with confidence.

"I think you're wrong."

Emily walked over to where Hotch sat on the edge of his bed and kneeled down in front of him. "I'm not wrong. I know Morgan. He respects you too much to do this to you. He values your friendship. And when the evil blonde bitch goes to him and offers the job to him he's going to either laugh or come to you and talk about it, but Hotch I know he's not going to take it. So, don't worry about it. It'll all be fine. Okay? Don't stress out before you have to. No one's taking this job away from you. You're the best there is," Emily said with a smile.

"Thanks Prentiss."

"Anytime," Emily said as she patted his knee. They looked at each other for a few seconds before she stood up. "I better get going."

"I appreciate you watching Jack for me. I know it was last minute."

"Nonsense! He's a great kid. I was happy to. And it's not like I have a life Hotch."

They both let out a laugh.

"I'll see you tomorrow. Try to get some sleep, Hotch."

"I will. Thanks again Emily."

She smiled when he used her first name. It didn't happen often and as she left his apartment she knew he was over reacting. Morgan wouldn't do that to him…she knew it.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Two days had passed and Hotch and Prentiss hadn't talked about what happened at his apartment. Emily was doing paperwork when she heard Strauss laugh and looked up to see her with Morgan. Her gaze followed them. Why do they look so chummy, she thought to herself. She continued to stare until—

"Emily, are you alright?" Reid asked concerned for his spaced out friend.

Her eyes snapped to his. "Yeah, I'm fine Reid, I'm just thinking. You know me, my mind wanders."

Reid nodded in agreement then went back to his own pile of work. Emily's gaze found Morgan and Strauss again and she felt someone starring at her and she looked at Hotch's office to find him starring at her with a sad look on his face. She gave him half a smile before finding the two culprits once more. Morgan shook her hand and she left. Morgan walked back to his desk and Emily quickly stood up and grabbed his arm and pulled him with her to the break area. She turned to look at him.

"What was that about?"

"What?"

"Strauss! What happened? What'd she want?"

"Oh, um…she wants me to take over as Unit Chief."

"And?"

"And what?"

"What did you say?" She really hated when Morgan didn't catch on quickly.

"Emily she didn't really leave me much of a choice."

"There is always a choice!" Emily snapped then stepped closer to Morgan so she wouldn't yell at him and cause a scene. "So you're really going to do it? After everything he's been through, you're really going to take that away from him? Wow! You know when I heard about this I defended you. I said there was no way you'd take it. You wouldn't do that to someone you care about but apparently I was wrong. I said you were a better person than that. You were a better friend, but thanks for clearing that up for me Morgan. You just let me know I suck at being a profiler." She turned on her heels and stormed away from him.

"Em!"

She twirled back around to look at him. "If I were you I wouldn't talk to me right now." She headed back to her seat pissed off.

~*~*~*~*~*~*

Three hours passed before Morgan went up to Emily and bent down to whisper in her ear. "It's your fault I have to do this you know."

Emily's head snapped up. "Excuse me?"

"Strauss said Hotch's head wasn't always in the game and his judgment is blurred and it's blurred because of you."

"How the hell do you figure that?"

"She sees how close you two have gotten. She's not blind."

"Well apparently she is because nothing is going on. Yes, we may have gotten closer than we were in the beginning but I'm as close to Hotch as I am to all of you. I have drinks with Rossi; I play and lose games with Reid. I go out dancing with you. There's no difference between all of that with how I am with Hotch. What did you say to her when she said that?"

"I told her I haven't noticed anything. That we're all friends and he hasn't made any bad choices regarding you or any of us."

"You may have said that to her, but then you come over here and blame me for this happening. I don't get it Morgan." Emily got up from her seat and headed to the bathroom to get away from Morgan for a while. She took a few deep breaths then started to wonder if what Morgan said was true. Yes, she was becoming closer to Hotch, but nothing outside of friendship has ever happened between them. She may have thought about it, but she never acted on it. She looked into the mirror and glared at her reflection, was Hotch losing his position that he worked so hard for because of her? She needed to know, but she was scared of what the response would be, especially if it was her fault. She nodded to herself then headed to the one person she knew would tell her the truth.

~*~*~*~*~*

Emily walked back into the bullpen and walked right past Morgan and Reid who were looking at her. She went up the few steps to get to Hotch's office and lightly knocked on the door.

"Come in."

She poked her head in. "Hey, can I talk to you?"

"Of course." He gestured for her to sit in one of the chairs in front of his desk. She closed the door quietly and headed for the chair.

"Is this all my fault?" She asked skipping the small talk and getting right to business.

"Is what all your fault?"

"You losing the Unit Chief position. Is it because of me?"

"No Prentiss, it's not your fault. Who told you that?"

"Morgan. He said that we're too close or some crap and that your judgments blurred when it comes to me. So am I the reason that Morgan is taking over?"

Hotch shook his head. "It's no where near your fault Prentiss. It's mine."

She blinked. "What? How is it yours?"

"I let you get too close to me. I let my barriers down and now I'm paying for my choices." Hotch frowned.

"I don't understand."

"My judgment is impaired because I don't want anything to happen to you, so I make sure you're always with me or Morgan. I don't ever let you go in somewhere first for that same reason. I was the one who let you get too close Emily. I'm the one who can't stop thinking about you, so none of this is your fault. It's all mine. And I apologize that you were even brought into this and that it was even mentioned to you. I didn't want you to know. I'm sorry."

Emily blinked several times to try to clear her mind. It took all she had not to go to the other side of the desk and kiss the man in front of her who just told her he was protective of her, but she knew she had to act nonchalant so that he had a chance of clearing things up and getting his job back. She took a deep breath before she began. "Hotch…listen. Just because you don't want anything to happen to me and you don't let me go off by myself doesn't mean that your judgment is impaired. You think the same thing about JJ and Garcia. Don't let people put things into your head because they want to push you out of your job. You looking out for me is part of you being the leader. You feel responsible for everyone. If Strauss doesn't realize that then she's a bigger idiot than I thought. You are an amazing leader Hotch. You are an amazing friend. You can't let her get away with this. You may not think I know this about you, but losing your position as Unit Chief will destroy you. So I don't care what you have to do, I don't care what you have to say, but you need to march into that wicked witches office and tell her, no _demand_ to her that you want your job back, and that you deserve it. Because if you don't, Hotch I will, and I might get fired from my words to her."

Hotch stared back into Emily's eyes and saw something that he's never seen before. He realized that she has feelings for him, just like he has for her, but their jobs are stopping her from acting on it. He tried to clear his mind from those thoughts, but he figured now was as good a time as any to get her to open up, so he lowered his eyes. "I agree with you that I would do the same thing with JJ and Garcia as I would do with you, but please don't act like there's nothing between us. I care about you Emily and if that means that I lose the head position here then so be it."

"Hotch, stop."

"No Emily, no matter what you say, nothing is going to change my mind. I just have to deal with the changes that Strauss is making, but I'm sure I'll get through it."

Emily got out of her seat and started to pace around the office. "You can't do this. Do you not understand how much you need this job? Besides Jack, it is your life. You gave up your marriage for this job damn it! Don't you dare try to tell me that it's not important to you!"

"This job is important to me. It's very important to me, and I've given up many things because of it, and I think maybe it's time to put something that means more to me than this job in the front of my mind. And that thing that's more important to me is you."

Emily stopped her pacing and turned to face Hotch while placing her hands on her hips. "Will you listen to yourself? You don't mean anything you're saying. You LOVE this job! You love everything about it. You love finding the bad guys and saving innocent people and giving others closure for their loses. You told me there was nothing I could say that will make you change your mind, well I have to try. If you don't go up to Strauss and tell her she's wrong about everything then I quit! That way I won't be here to 'distract' you or whatever the hell they said. Do you understand what I'm saying? Don't make me do that Hotch, just go up there and get your job back before I come over there and kick your ass!" Emily all but yelled at him.

Hotch stood up slowly. "You're serious aren't you?" Emily nodded. "So you want me to lie to her to get my job back?" Emily nodded again. Hotch lowered his head to avoid eye contact with her. He couldn't let her quit, but he also knew that if he took the Unit Chief position back the chances of them being together were slim to none. He closed his eyes but he opened them when he felt Emily's presence right next to him. Her hand was on his shoulder and she turned him to face her. Their eyes locked and she cupped his face in between her hands. "Please don't be mad at me Hotch. I hear what you're saying, and I'm not going to lie to you, I feel something for you, but please don't throw everything that you've worked so hard to protect away because of those feelings. I'm not going anywhere!"

"Prove it." Emily pulled his head down some and her lips crashed onto his. Her tongue begged for entrance and they fought for dominance. Hotch's hands came up to rest on her hips and he pulled her closer to him. She moaned into his mouth when her body became flush against his. She pulled back and gave Hotch a sweet smile before licking her lips.

"Is that proof enough for you? Now if you go and talk to Strauss and convince her to give you your job back I promise you there can be much more than that happening between us. And stop worrying about being distracted by me because you won't be. Remember you treat me just like you treat JJ and Garcia. Remember that and getting your job back will be a piece of cake. And if you get it back, there will be a special something in store for you, but that is only if you get your job back." She leaned up and kissed him again. "Now how's that for inspiration?"

Hotch grinned at Emily and smacked her ass on his way out of his office. He had a job to go get back, and if Emily promised him something more, than there was nothing on this Earth that was going to stop him from getting it. He was going to get his job and the woman of his dreams.


End file.
